The thought occurred to me when responding to a post on another blog in the aftermath of the
Sandy Hook shootings. The comment was “your well regulated militia
just shot up another school”. After all,
isn’t getting rid of rights the logical argument in favor of preserving and
promulgating the general welfare? My
thought was that my off-hand sarcastic remark really needed more intellectual
scrutiny than time and space allowed at the time.
The First Amendment
Religion: Given the large number of wars and other violent acts attributable to disagreements in faith and creed. Wouldn’t we all be better off if we were all good Protestants? Think about it, we could all go to church together and sing hymns, pray, and commune together, which would be so much easier when we all believe exactly the same things.
Speech: Why should you be able to shoot your mouth off and foster dissent and dissatisfaction? What good does your freedom of speech do me? Or us? How are we better off for your right to bad-mouth our president and undocumented immigrants? Think! We could end congressional gridlock a heartbeat after they are all required to embrace and utter the same words.
Assembly: Just think about it… we won’t have another riot, no more looting, lynching, or malcontents camping in our public spaces. No more union thugs beating up reporters.
Redress: The government will only and always act in the best interests of the people and their general welfare… what is there to redress?
The Second Amendment
Won’t the world be a much better place without guns? No more shootings, no gun crime. We don’t need personal arms or even a militia. We have the government to protect us with its Army, Navy, and Police SWAT teams. Isn’t it obvious? Isn’t it wonderful?
The Third Amendment
Quartering: Just think about it for a second. What’s safer than having a soldier billeted in your home? You won’t need guns when you have your very own soldier. The 21 billion dollars saved in military housing costs can be used to sponsor a government program to fund birth control and abortions for your daughters. See? No risk at all having troops billeted in your home.
The Fourth Amendment
Search and Seizure: Face it; the only people who think searches are unreasonable are people with something to hide. We’d all be a lot safer if we were frisked now and then. As far as seizure of property goes, isn’t it obvious? You didn’t make it or build it; you wouldn’t have it if it weren’t for government. How can the government seize what it already rightfully owns?
The Fifth Amendment
Due process: Isn't the process what the government says it is? Double jeopardy? You're the one that put yourself in jeopardy by committing crimes... why should you get off because of some incompetent prosecutor or police officer? Eminent domain? Everyone knows that we'll all be better off with a Walmart than your run down old home.
The Sixth Amendment
Trial by Jury: Really? Don’t we all know that James Holmes of Aurora is guilty? What is the point of a trial? What reason lies behind this charade where we call him the suspect and the accused? Do you think the cops go around arresting innocent people? If you are doing questionable things, shouldn't you be responsible for proving your innocence? Why burden the rest of us with the costs of defending you?
The Seventh Amendment
Civil Trial by Jury: You seriously think 12 people chosen at random are qualified to judge? Hell! We can’t agree on who should win American Idol let alone the effect of the release of Poly-Chlorinated Biphenyl’s into the environment. 12 chemists might be able to come to a reasonable conclusion, but certainly not a jury of your peers. You’d all be better off if we simply eliminated juries and let the judges decide.
The Eighth Amendment
Excessive Bail: Seriously, if you’re guilty until proven innocent, why do you want these criminals wandering the streets before trial?
Cruel and Unusual Punishment: Is there any punishment that is really too cruel or too unusual for someone who guns down 20 six and seven year olds? Get real!
The Ninth Amendment
Non-enumerated Rights: Bwah ha ha ha! You don’t have any.
See commentary on the 10th below.
The Tenth Amendment
Powers reserved for the states or to the people: Well obviously, look around, that one must have been repealed years ago. We just missed it.
It Takes a Big Man to Admit He Made a MistakeMy first thought was that Obama ought to climb into Air Force One, fly to London, abjectly throw himself at the feet of Queen Elizabeth and grovel and beg for readmission into the Commonwealth of Nations, for obviously we made a serious mistake some two hundred years ago, with all this silly talk of rights and freedoms. What has it gotten us other than pain, suffering, and bloodshed?
But then I thought, perhaps that wasn't going far enough, maybe we should just sign the entire nation over to the Chinese in exchange for 16 trillion dollars and dissolve the government. After all, perhaps the English are a bit too... shall we say, "liberal" for our tastes. The Chinese have, for all these years, demonstrated the effectiveness of a leftist government. There are alternatives, North Korea and Cuba pop to mind, but frankly, they just don't have the cash.
Wouldn't we all be better off safely ensconced in the loving arms of government, secure in the knowledge that we could live our lives without thought to consequences? No one would ever dare offend us or discriminate against us. We would get fed when we were hungry, medicine when we were sick, and when our time came... we would die patriotically without costing our friends and neighbors too much money.
Dripping With SarcasmThis post is dedicated to those people that say things like "your militia just shot up another school", "the pro pollution crowd will be disappointed", "One failed attempt at a shoe bomb[ing], and we all take off our shoes at the airport".
They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. ~Benjamin Franklin
SHEEPYou gave up the Fourth when some nut job tried to set his underwear on fire.
You've called for giving up the First in the name of political correctness and hate speech.
You're willing to give up the Second now!
Why not just go whole hog and give it all up, I'm sure you'll sleep better at night.
The shearings will commence April 15th...get in the barn.