Thursday, March 31, 2016

Donald Trump for President -- My Anti-Manifesto

! ! ! This is not an official Western Hero Endorsement ! ! !
*** Personal opinion of Kurt Silverfiddle ***
~~ my penultimate blog post ~~

Trump’s popularity is a direct result of a tsunami of economic and cultural globalism that has flooded the shores of America over the last 25 years. (RCP - Bruce Haynes)

GOP Stool
Election 2016: A Guano-Filled Pi├▒ata

Vapid, outdated talk of the three-legged stool of GOP Conservatism (Defense, Economic, Social) makes me want to smash up the GOP saloon, shoot their piano player in the back and throw the stool through the front window...

The GOP Stool has Collapsed

Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld-Rice burned the neocon leg off the stool in a failed Shock and Awe chemistry set experiment (Don't try this at home, kids!)...

The Free Market leg shattered and was found to be a fake Chinese knock-off made out of hollow balsa wood reinforced only by toxic lead paint...

And the nation has overwhelmingly rejected mean-faced, un-Christ-like social conservatism preached to them by a pharisaical clutch of angry hypocrites.

So, that leaves the GOP sitting on their asses on a little round wooden circle on the floor, goggled-eyed and slack-jawed, wondering what the hell happened.

No stool, no ideas, no concept of how to sell ideas if they had any, no charisma, no charity in their hearts, no clue...

And we wonder why Donald Trump is storming the ramparts and on his way to being the GOP's standard-bearer...

El Trumpo has elicited absurdities from the GOP such as...

* He will destroy the GOP brand among women, minorities and immigrants (I'll pause so the laughter can subside)

* Vote Hillary to save conservatism from Trump (this reveals the true GOP establishmentarian mindset: Reject millions of new GOP voters and go down in flames to International Crime Boss Hillary Clinton rather than win with Trump)

Trump is the Revolution we've been waiting for

The Republican Establishment hates Trump: The GOP (along with the Democrats) have whored themselves out to Wall Street, The Crony Chamberpot of Communists and global corporations. They have sold our birthright out from under us, all in the name of pristine economic theory that works great in a cold, sterile vacuum, but in reality has wrecked whole communities and the lives of millions.

The Democrat Establishment hates Trump:  An increasingly elite, upscale and uber-rich Democrat Party abandoned the working class years ago. The Democrats dance for the big money now, reaping millions and billions from Silicon Valley, Wall Street, corporations and urban professionals, even as they excoriate them and preach false populist demagoguery to the naive masses. So we now have a DC uni-party Peronism of the elite, by the elite and for the elite, and perhaps only a genuine bombastic populist demagogue can smash it...

Governments around the globe are quaking at the prospect of a President Trump: Why?  Because they know with Trump, the joyride on Uncle Sam's dime is over. A Trump America says to the world, no more mollycoddling, pull your own weight, fight your own damned wars.  We're ripping up trade deals forged by turncoat vampires who couldn't give a shit about American workers, and we're no longer taking in your human debris that washes up on our shores. America is done playing the Patsy.

The political Commentariate is wringing its wizened hands, but who cares? Face it, the world hates us, and they've always hated us.  On a person-to-person basis the many Europeans and Latin Americans I spent years living among, drinking and playing music with, enjoying warm, beautiful friendships... They are wonderful people. But writ large, on a macro level, Europeans and Latin Americans are resentful, whiny America-haters and they can shove it where the sun don't shine. They are screaming in outrage and "thinking again" about America?  One more reason to pull that lever for El Donaldo.

Damn the Tomatoes, Full Speed Ahead!

Trump's a liar? Don't care; Hillary's worse.
Bad people like him? Don't care; horrible anti-American organizations organize for Democrats.
He's never saw a low road he failed speed down with reckless abandon? Don't care; Hillary is an irresponsible warmonger.
No political experience? Don't care; Wall Street Warmonger Hillary Clinton is Dick Cheney in drag.
Idiot leftwing shit-stirrers get beaten up at his rallies? Don't care; they deserve it.
He can't do all those thing he says he will do? I Don't. Effing. Care.  Maybe we'll have the pleasure of watching him literally run over some intransigent Democrat lawmakers with a real steamroller in front of the Capitol.

I'm joining that ignorant legion, the millions of fellow voters who ignore facts and logic. Who needs intellectual analysis? We survived eight years of hollow man Obama; Trump can bring no worse. I'm joining the overwhelming majority of my fellow voters in making up my mind, slamming it shut and closing my eyes and ears to further evidence.

Trump: The "EFF YOO" Eye-Gouge from Hell

President Obama says "punish your enemies," and by Gaia, he's right. Few things are more satisfying to the human soul than seeing people get what they deserve...

So, this is our opportunity to... 

Eye-gouge the batwinged gargoyles; blast the flying monkeys out of the sky; kick the shit out of the DC Praetorian Guard; scald the red asses of the poop-throwing bolshevik baboons and their bullhorn brigades; throw a flaming pie in the faces of the progressive scolds; tar and feather the GOP Ayatollahs; show the one-worlders the door... and then slam their dicks in it. We can finally tell the foreign pisants and ankle-biters to get lost, go solve their own problems, and stop pestering such a grand and important nation as the United States of America.

Pull a lever and dance to the tortured screams of the Republicans, the Democrats, the DC Establishment, the Punditocracy, screaming loony leftards, conservative windbags, the Global Elites, and the craven foreign governments and their teeming, resentful masses who hate us but who all want to come here.

Donald Trump presents a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to nail them all in the nuts with one swift kick.

Register as early as possible, vote for Trump as early and as many times as possible, then say to hell with it all, disconnect from the idiotic political freakshow. Go do what you enjoy. Garden, play music, train gophers to reenact crappy SNL skits, build model airplanes, woodwork, write, juggle cats, draw, paint.  Get high, get roaring drunk, whatever.

In summary, with apologies to Timothy Leary...

Turn out, Tune out, Drop Out

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