I know I do. If Romney vs. Obama doesn't make you want to gouge out your eyes, light yourself on fire and run screaming off of a cliff, I don't know what will...
Nuthin' some Jack Daniels, BBQ and playing music with friends won't solve. One of my buddies is bringing over a banjo he just inherited from his grandpa.
My new favorite thing is Cracked.com. I remember Cracked from my childhood as the alternative to Mad Magazine for the discriminating pre-teen boy, and I didn't realize until the other day that they had a web site. Who doesn't, I guess...
Anyway, here are a couple of snippets that had me laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes, and that hasn't happened for a long time. It's a little racy, but nothing too over the top. As a bonus, since it has Cher in metal underwear I can tag this as a Rule 5 post!
What follows is all from Cracked, not my cracked brain. I only wish I were this inventive. Chime in and let us know which were your favorites ...
The 19 Most Hilariously Failed Attempts at Sexy Album Covers
There's a lot going on in this album cover, and all of it is awesome. But what you can't see is what happened moments later. The snake actually got this woman pregnant. Nine months later, she gave birth to a full-size 1978 Ford Econoline Van with an airbrushed picture of a Viking riding a fire breathing dragon through the night sky on the side of it.
# 6. Whitesnake - Love Hunter
There's a lot going on in this album cover, and all of it is awesome. But what you can't see is what happened moments later. The snake actually got this woman pregnant. Nine months later, she gave birth to a full-size 1978 Ford Econoline Van with an airbrushed picture of a Viking riding a fire breathing dragon through the night sky on the side of it.
# 10. Cher - Take Me Home
Nothing turns on a man like metal lingerie that, by our count, has 13 different points capable of tearing open your scrotum if she makes an unexpected move.
#5. Ready America 77100 Cat Evacuation Kit
Your first thought might be, "Is this a joke product?" No, you asshole. Some people, when faced with a fire or earthquake, might want to leave the house with their cat safely restrained and well-supplied instead of releasing it into the street to be run over by an arriving emergency vehicle. Maybe this product isn't for you if you like to throw your cat into the path of approaching fire trucks, but some people can make use of it.
Sorry, I'm supposed to be presenting sarcastic reviews, not writing them. As you can guess, most of the jokes come from misunderstood instructions, although each of these reviewers decided to go a different direction.
